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Showing posts with label funny humor satire reading article modern ghana. Show all posts
Showing posts with label funny humor satire reading article modern ghana. Show all posts

Thursday, July 14, 2011

LIONEL MESSI HAS TO WIN THE WORLD CUP TO BECOME GREATEST FOOTBALLER OF ALL TIME

The meteoric rise of Argentine international, Lionel Andres Messi has led a lot of soccer fans to conclude that he’s the greatest player of all time. Lionel Messi has won everything there is to win, in terms of club football at the age of just 23 years but for Lionel Messi to permanently engrave his name in the history of football, he has to win the World Cup with Argentina.In the era of Pele and Maradona, playing good football at a good club was a prerequisite to becoming a great football but winning the World Cup was the ultimate…and so is today!
Pele was known for his dribbling, powerful shot and occasional wonderful free kicks. ‘The King’ may not have played football in Europe as he rejected the offer Spanish giants, Real Madrid, made in 1962 but he certainly achieved a lot with his football club, Santos. Edison Arantes do Nascimento made his debut for Santos at the age of 16 years and was topscorer in the Campeonato Paulista (Brazilian league) for nine consecutive years (1957-1965). With his club side, Pele won 2 Copa Libertadores (the South American edition of the Champions League), 10 Campeonato Paulista titles (Brazilian league titles) amongst others. Most importantly, Pele won the World Cup not once, twice but thrice even playing a leading role at his first World Cup in 1958 at the age of just 17 years. Pele actually gained world wide recognition when he won the World Cup. In all, Pele scored 1087 goals in 1120 appearances including a record 77 goals in 92 appearances for the Selecao (Brazilian national team).
 Diego Maradona is the other player who rivals Pele for title of THE GREATEST PLAYER OF ALL TIME. Diego Armando Maradona was first noticed when he won the FIFA U-20 World Cup in 1979 with Argentina. He was crowned the best player of that tournament. After 6 successful seasons with Argentinos Juniors and Boca Juniors in his native Argentina, ‘El Diego’ joined Spanish club, FC Barcelona for 5 million pounds in 1982. His time at Barcelona was a potpourri of success, niggling injuries and indiscipline as he was quickly thrown out of Iberia and into the Italian peninsula. In the Serie A, Maradona led Napoli to two Serie A titles in 1987 and 1990 which was sandwiched by two second place finishes. Diego was even top scorer in the 1987/1988 season with 15 goals to his name. During his time in Italy, the little Argentine powered Napoli to the UEFA Cup, Italian Super Cup and the Coppa Italia as well. In all this, his best moments came at the World Cup. Maradona participated in four consecutive World Cup events. His talismanic nature was brought to the fore in 1986 where he, as it were, single handedly propelled Argentina to the final, ultimately winning the World Cup, as a captain. Maradona and his Argentine side were in the final again four years later but narrowly lost in controversial manner to West Germany whilst his ill-fated 1994 World Cup campaign brought to an abrupt end his sweet romance with international football. In all 34 goals in 91 appearances is what Maradona managed for the Argentine national team whilst he hit a total haul of 311 goals in 589 games in all competitions.
Modern great players include Zinedine Zidane, Thierry Henry, Ronaldo de Lima, Cafu, Alessandro Nesta, Claude Makelele, Paolo Maldini, David Bechamp and a host of others. In modern football, three trophies are quintessential if a player wants to be revered as the greatest player of all time: The Champions League trophy, The World Cup Trophy and Domestic League trophy in a reputable league! Many of these modern great players have won two of these three major trophies…only a selected a few have won all three trophies…Zinedine Zidane, Thierry Henry, Cafu and Roberto Carlos readily comes to mind. By now, Arsenal fans now know why Thierry Henry left the shores of England to win the Champions League with FC Barcelona in Spain. He wanted to secure his name as a candidate for ‘GREATEST FOOTBALLER ‘. Ronaldo de Lima never won the UEFA Champions League title though a quick glance at the clubs he featured for in his illustrious career reveals European powerhouses like FC Barcelona, Inter Milan, Real Madrid and AC Milan. Does this mean that he cannot be considered as a great player? This is an emphatic NO!! His exploits in the World Cup has cemented his name in football folklore! Having won two World Cup titles (1994 and 1998) and holding the enviable record of 15 World Cup goals is enough evidence to regard him as one of the greatest players of all time. Zinedine Zidane has won it all; The UEFA Champions League (2001/2002), World Cup (1998) and Domestic League titles (with Juventus and Real Madrid).
What does this mean for Lionel Messi? Messi has won everything in club football including an unprecedented sextuple in 2009. The Barca ace needs to lift the World Cup with Argentina sooner or later. Messi played a bit part in the 2006 World Cup in Germany but was the star of the team in 2010 where he did not score a goal but was involved in almost all the goals Argentina scored. That World Cup adventure ended in cataclysm when Argentina was walloped 4-0 by the German machines in the quarter-finals. The forward can appear in three more World Cups; 2014, 2018 and 2022.The Brazilians are favourites to win the World Cup in 2014 as they are the hosts. Messi will be 27 years old and at his peak by then. By 2022 World Cup, the current best player in the world will be 35 years old and may certainly be ready to hang his boots. Messi has to act fast in either the 2014 or 2018 World Cup! (The latter looks more probable). The Lilliputian might have won everything there is in football but winning the World Cup with Argentina will seal the endorsement made by all and sundry that LIONEL MESSI IS THE GREATEST PLAYER OF ALL TIME.

 By Emmanuel Ampiah (ampiahee@yahoo.com)

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

The Modern-Day Juju man

What do you expect from a write-up with such a title? Perhaps you are expecting a virtual roller coaster ride through the various shrines scattered across the length and breadth of Ghana. Or better yet, you’re yearning for an in-depth analysis of the job description of juju men. Well, that wouldn’t be necessary because the Ghanaian and Nigerian film industry has brought us all into close contact with the activities of these men. I’m neither a wannabe juju man nor a traditional believer. Rather, I’m just a young writer whose attention was drawn to the new twist in the modus operandi of our juju men.

Recent centuries have seen the world being dubbed a “global village,” perhaps due to globalization and its effects. Hence, cultures are now being bridged. Today, with just a single press of a button, one can access a vast collection of information from archeology to zoology. Voice communication has also seen a further boost. At least, I can now talk to my nomadic friend, Abdulai in far away Zuarungu, without having to make that 817 km journey up north from Accra, which translates into 14 hours of steady travel by bus. With these technological advancements, many opined that the influence of jujumen, whom some refer to as traditional healers or priests, would dwindle. Many were of the view that as society developed, the once exulted position of these men would come to naught. Quite ironically, that’s far from the reality. As the African adage goes, “Since hunters have learnt to shoot without missing, birds have also learnt to fly without perching!”

For the sake of some readers who have little or no idea who a juju man is, let me pause here and shed just a little light on them. One reference work traced the etymology of “juju” to somewhere in West Africa or France, as a term used by the “white” imperialists who in times past visited the African continent. They used the term in reference to the indigenous West African Religion. With time however, the term gained roots in the Americas due to the number of West African slaves who became victims of the inhuman Trans-Atlantic Slave Trade, who took their acts of juju along with them to the “White Man’s Land.” A juju man’s preoccupation is looking for omens, casting spells, preparing charms, curing the incurable as well as dealing in acts of necromancy. In recent times, they even strengthen marriages, aid in the acquisition of travel documents, help clients secure promotions at work, aid university students in the attainment of first class honors. A few months back, it was rumored that one of these men even aided a Ghanaian head of state in securing an overwhelming victory in a general election, by as it were, binding voters with a spell. Well, the least said about that particular issue, the better!

In times past, to find a juju man was a very arduous task due to the fact that they dwelt at the remotest parts of villages as well as in the thickest of forests. It was thus attendant on their seekers to search them out. However, what pertains today? Are they still operating in camera? Ex cathedra, I dare say that the opposite rather pertains in our modern society. Thus, instead of globalization clamping down on their activities, it has rather been a phenomenon that has given juju men the right publicity they need. Their trade has thus become far from unpopular. Readers in Accra may have on a number of occasions heard of Nana Kwaku Bonsam, Nana Oboa Nnipa, Nana Ababio (Akingye Wura, i.e., lover of challenges). How may they have heard of him? Through the radio! Day after day, commercials of these men are run on most radio stations, providing contact details and type of services provided. In addition, they all have large digital billboards littered all around the city. Nana Kwaku Bonsam for instance has a mammoth billboard at Sapeiman, a suburb of Accra, with the inscription “Nana Kwaku Bonsam welcomes you to Accra!” among others.  A similar billboard is erected at Kasoa bearing the same inscriptions in addition of “consultation days and hours.” Well, that’s what technology can do. Perhaps readers in Kumasi may have also heard of Mallam Zack’s commercials on Hello FM. Such a touching commercial! And perhaps also heard of Nana Kwaku Bonsam’s escapades in the Garden City! Thus, gradually, these men have tapped into the various elements of globalization to promote their ventures.

In their bid to increase their fan base, many of them have made copious use of the internet, with most of them having websites and email addresses through which their clients can contact them.  If you’re on FACEBOOK, do well to search for Mallam Zack and Nana Kwaku Bonsam and add them as friends. Who knows, you may need their help someday. You can also get them on YOUTUBE as well!! That’s how far they have come. No doubt they even ride in the flashiest of cars! That’s how far our modern day jujumen have come.

In fact, I had wanted to take some footage of some of the billboards mentioned herein. On one occasion, I was on location, only to realize I took no batteries with me. Perhaps he cast a spell on me! On another occasion, the billboard scared me: it had a fearful picture of the juju man in his juju outfit with the inscription “Akyingye Wura” boldly written above his portrait. I must confess I got scared and put my camera back into its pouch.

What more can I say…………………………………THIS PAPER IS STILL UNDER CONSTRUCTION


By Stephen Duasua Yankey.